An Admission

I haven't been able to admit this to anyone.

I keep having dreams about my latest ex, Chris. In them, I am always in some kind of public place with my friends, usually a bar. He comes out of nowhere. We haven't spoken in months, and he's always home on leave from one of his travels for work. He pulls me aside, and he tells me that he wants me back. That I was the best thing that ever happened to him. That he loved me all along. That he was stupid to have let me go.

And always, I wake up with a racing heart, hoping it was the truth. When the real world hits again, I can't help but smile a little at my own idiocy.

The path to getting over someone you love is never easy...and I also know I have to tread cautiously. I've been out on four dates with someone else...and it's not fair that I want to be with him, and that I want to be with Chris too.

Until the dreams stop, it's only fair for me to stay right where I am.